I’m back from my road trip, tired, but happy, and hope you all had a good Thanksgiving holiday, even those of you who don’t observe Thanksgiving, or don’t deserve a happy day, and you know who I mean by that.

I got to catch up on some family and old friends, and that’s always good because we can live in the past, when we had a functioning government and healthy Constitution. I also got to catch up with a few enemies, and the Sicilians were right. Revenge is a meal best tasted when cold. I hope the dentist is expensive, Mikey.

I missed a few people I wanted to see, and obviously, there will have to be further road trips to catch up with them, and there are always more enemies, right?

In the meantime I see that the national intelligence quotient hasn’t risen much:

SOUTHWORTH, Wash. - A man trying to loosen a stubborn lug nut blasted the wheel with a 12-gauge shotgun, injuring himself badly in both legs, sheriff's deputies said.

The 66-year-old man had been repairing a Lincoln Continental for two weeks at his home in Kitsap County northwest of Southworth, about 10 miles southwest of Seattle, and had gotten all but one of the lug nuts off the right rear wheel by Saturday afternoon, Kitsap County Deputy Scott Wilson said.

And – no, you’re wrong.

"Nobody else was there, and he wasn't intoxicated," Wilson said.

Maybe he should just have used a bigger hammer.